She
A strong shock, obscurity, confusion. There! Lies in that deep dark pit, her beautiful golden hair now is stained, his stiff torso as ever, now she has only one of her thin and shiny legs, her arms are amputees, her elegant dress ... Oh! Yes, I will have to ask my mom for another doll.
By Elsa Castillo
I like your story Elsa! It's funny and it has a surprising ending!
ReplyDeleteSilvia Monreal Ruano
I think the same because it reminds me a poem about a beautiful woman...and you can imagine her... and finally is a simple doll, really it has a surprising ending
ReplyDeleteLorena Prieto
ReplyDeleteI like this story because it has a surprise ending, as you'd expect something catastrophic, then the end is funny
When I started to read the story I imagined something horrible, you can imagine perfectly the body because the story has a lot of details, and the end surprised me a lot!
ReplyDeleteIt´s a fantastic story!
María del mar Valencia Ruiz de Ojeda
I like this story because it has a surprising ending and a curious title that when I read it I think that the protagonist was a girl, I could never imagine that she was a small doll.
ReplyDeleteThe story seems terrible, scary but the end is amazing and funny.
Congratulations Elsa.
Carla Corrochano
I like this story because I find very interesting and presents a powerful, captivating imagery.
ReplyDeleteHas a final sentence or ending that makes us want to reread the story. Has and attractive title. The story is amazing and very funny.
Congratulations!
MARÍA LUZ SÁNCHEZ
Hey, I agree with all comments of my partners!
ReplyDeleteFrom my point of view, this is a fantastic story for several reasons, the writer´s style, and its originality.
I feel that it works because offers a captivating imagery "a young girl has lost her favorite doll at the underground”, for example.
I highlight the evolution of different feelings that the reader can experience through the development of the short story: Fear, disgust, pity, surprise and comfort. Also, I emphasize the maturity showed by the girl, she is able to assume "the doll´s death" and find a suitable solution to her problem: "ask her mom other one", ups, what intelligence!
I´d like continue reading more about "She", for example how she faces the first day of school, and so on.
Thanks for your story and regards!
Mª Ángeles Moya Heras
This story works because it works the imagination, at first I think the author is describing a horrible story, legs amputated ... but the ending is surprising because it comes to my mind the image of the Barbie to which all of us we take a one leg time ...
ReplyDeleteCongratulations is a very good story!
Mar López González